Friday, July 29, 2005

Hey, a US Cellular commercial that's funny!

And I'm going to steal the line "...previously delicious meat."

Thanks, Joan.

This is the Jump.

More signs I am dorky:

I was walking around downtown the other day, and I passed a little yippy dog that decided it was going to be friendly. Which is fine with me, and I appeased it, petted it, scratched behind its ear, and moved on. As I continued in the opposite direction, it's owner said "Come on, Marley," and my immediate thought was:

"Do you suppose it's named after Bob, or Jacob?"

Followed shortly thereafter by:

"Poor Ziggy. You didn't even consider him. You made a Dickens reference before considering Ziggy."

But I think that's probably a good thing.

This is the Jump.

I posted this on the Boblog

This was also on the Book of Bob Blog, bookofboblog.blogspot.com

was driving to work today, and I saw a group (gaggle? mob? flock?) of Mormons in a Saturn Ion. At least, they looked like Mormons. I didn't pull close enough to them on the expressway to gauge their theological beliefs, really. ANYWAY, I thought "Saturn Full of Mormons," was a good name for a show or team. Especially if edited to, let's say "Volkswagen Full of Mormons," or something. Which leads me to post the old ideas for team names. So, here:

  • [Vehicle] Full of Mormons
  • Pope Urban, the Urban Pope
  • Purple Line Express
  • Lower Wacker
  • Hector Berlioz's Obsession
  • Toby/Betty
  • Hey, Socrates!
  • Death By Circumlocution
  • Disfluencies
  • Deo Gratias
  • Hippos Go Berzerk
  • Book of Bob (duh)
  • Yo' Mob is So Fat...
  • Que?

Any of these work as a show title? (i.e. Book of Bob presents "Hector Berlioz's Obsession")Anybody want to add funny things?

There's also an involved explanation of "Hector Berlioz's Obsession," which I rather like, but which is waaaaaaay too highbrow.

This is the Jump.

Thursday, July 21, 2005

The Coolest! (Today)

Today, I told the postage machine to refill itself, and it said the account only had $169.81 left in it. So, I took the $169. That's nation-wide. I got to be the guy to take the account down to zero. Or, 81 cents, anyway. I called the number afterward, and checked the last 5 transactions. There were at least 4 other locations that refilled this morning. 4 other doofuses, setting their doohickey to take money from somewhere and give it to the post office. Oh, how the corporate world does things in synchronicity, or some crap like that.

I thought it was cool, anyway.

This is the Jump.

Friday, July 15, 2005

I am a Dork

Since I don't have a ton to do at work, I've gotten into What If Sports, specifically the Gridiron Dynasty bit. It's sort of fantasy leagues gone insane, as you take the helm of a DIII school's football program and recruit and game plan, and eventually move up to DII, DI-AA, and DI-A. I'm running two schools, right now, and I'm pleased to report that both of my schools have the same logo:

Catholic University of America Cardinals (Hee hee!):


and the University of Chicago Maroons:


So, yeah, I'm pretty pleased about that. Also, I figured out how to put pictures in here. So that's pretty cool.

Also, the fact that the Catholic University athletic teams are called the cardinals just makes my day. Because the College of Cardinals football team is called the Catholic. AND that reminds me - my friggin' PS2 better be fixable (cheap), because I want NCAA 2006 NOW.

This has been a nerdy post.

This is the Jump.

Thursday, July 14, 2005

You know that sign?

About Vandals being prosecuted? What about Goths? Visigoths? Ostrogoths? What about them?

This is the Jump.

Umm...

That wasn't funny. Funny will happen shortly. I swear.

This is the Jump.

I feel bad, because you suck.

I was listening to the radio on the way to work this morning, and the conversation was tremendously depressing. The conversation was about a post on Craigslist wherin the author said that he often paid for sex. He’d go to girls at clubs and tell them that he wasn’t interested in a relationship, but he’d give them whatever (money, gifts, etc), have sex with them, and then kick them out. He was quite proud of himself, and there were callers who said they actually respected this, because he was upfront!

There were callers that agreed that this was the way things were, and the couple callers that said things like “It seems like there’s a larger self-esteem or respect issue here,” got taken apart. This isn’t the way things are. There was a bitterness that was sickening through the whole thing, and the idea that the idea of love is naïve is depressing. The idea that everybody’s just out to have as much anonymous sex as possible is cynical. And the thought that “if you saw a scorecard from your partners you’d be horrified,” is painful. Because that can’t be the way things work. It can’t be. It shouldn’t have to be. It’s dirty, and I don’t want to know the type of girl that says “Yeah, sure, thanks for being upfront. Give me my money, and we’ll have a good rogering,” because it screams about a lack of respect for yourself and for the other person. Or maybe I am being starry-eyed. The woman that was on the radio the longest told some 20-year-old that she was “sorry that she’d have go through it,” or something like that. It’s stupid. There seems to be an overwhelming population that has no problem with that philosophy. It’s part of the “club scene,” or whatever, and “nice guys” get killed, because the girls aren’t interested in them. That’s bullshit, too. This whole segment on the show was depressing and infuriating. But it does make me remember something:

I’m very, very, very lucky.

This is the Jump.

Wednesday, July 13, 2005

Introduction, in brief:

Usually, I plan on adding humorous things that occur to me here, so I can have a record of them. But perhaps serious things, too. I really don't have a good idea right now, I'm just trying to put off thinking of things. Or writing. So, here it is.

This is the Jump.