Oh, Theatre Bios. How I Loathe Thee.

I was thinking about being a real smartass when making my Bio for Picasso. So, we'd have something like:

"...graduated from Northwestern University in 2003 with a degree in theatre. And would like to make sure you know that. Northwestern Northwestern Northwestern."

"It is a particular pleasure to have the opportunity to play Einstein, which will shortly go into the 'Favorite roles include:' section of future bios."

"...really enjoys the fact that the ceilings are low down here, because it makes him feel, like, 5'8". At least."

"...hates writing bios."

"...spent the better part of 8 hours trying to record an outgoing message for his cell phone on 8/28."

Any other good ideas? I hate writing these.

This is the Jump.

NCAA '06

Storylines:

The College of Cardinals Catholic, located in Rome, PA, is poised for a respectable year in the Big East. Led by QB Francis Cardinal Arinze (Prefect of the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith and the Discipline of the Sacraments), and LOLB Francis Cardinal George, OMI (Chicago), and coached by Pope Benedict XVI in his first year as head coach, they may have some trouble with the Big East powers, but should hold their own. A case may be made for WR/KR Julius Cardinal Darmaatmadja, SJ (Jakarta) as a Heisman trophy candidate, after racking up over 600 all-purpose yards and 8 TDs (6 return TDs) in an early-season thrashing of Florida A&M. Though, frankly, his humility may not allow it.

The Northwestern Wildcats, of Evanston, IL, may have a somewhat difficult year against the powerhouse Big Ten conference. Led on defense by the troika of DE Loren O'Quitsalot, CB Dr. Limps Backes, and MLB Tim "Turn in your badge and your gun" McGarigle, hopefully they'll win the turnover battle. QB Brett Basanez should get some time behind a line anchored by C Travis "Doesn't Read" Rees. I don't know what they're going to do, other than that.

I like starting dynasties. It's fun.

This is the Jump.

Feature!

I'm Currently Reading: Einstein for Dummies (Never fear, I am following it with Ideas and Opinions, actually by Einstein.)

I'm Currently Listening To: Moulin Rouge Soundtrack. Keep your comments to yourself.

I'm Currently Watching: We have the Family Guy DVDs here. Which, you know, is Mortgage-related. I'm awesome.

I'm Currently Playing: NCAA '06. Hooray! The College of Cardinals Catholic, led by QB Francis Cardinal Arinze, and LOLB Francis Cardinal George, is making a run at the Big East title. The Northwestern Wildcats, led by... you know what, this is going to be a new post.

This is the Jump.

Horrors!

I'm beginning to think that Einstein in Picasso at the Lapin Agile has a bit of a German accent. But I don't actually know. And it's driving me crazy. Because I want to know, and I want to do it right. It's such a tiny space that we're performing in. I hope to God it works out. Aaaaaaargh.

This post is rambly and crappy, but tough. I'll be more coherent another time.

This is the Jump.

Damn You, Google Maps!

Google Maps has foiled my desire to drive to the following places from work:

• Buckingham Palace
• The Anchorage, AK Airport (though it can get me to Calgary and Edmonton)
• Quito, Ecuador
• Lima, Peru
• Tierra del Fuego, Argentina

Bastards!

This is the Jump.

Liam Brings Up A Good Point

Liam (once El Kabong) brought up something delightful in the comments section for the entry on what to call Book of Bob. To wit:

I'm a big fan of team names that really epitomize the city, like:

L.A.Riots
New England Snowdrifts Bigger Than Your Car
Detroit Blight
Miami Boat People

To which, I have to add my favorite fantasy league team names, based on the
same criteria:

• London Blitz
• Nice Sans-Cullottes
• Maginot Linemen

As well as the best thing about NCAA College Football for the Playstation:

• College of Cardinals Catholic

Which I think will have to be discussed in depth at a later date.

This is the Jump.

Hi-larious

Just discovered that Meghan here at work spend three summers in Jamaica in high school, building houses, for deaf children.

Which isn't funny, until I decided that these were really, really high deaf children. Who maybe weren't actually deaf, but were playing a prank on the innocent American high schooler. And that she had to build houses for the same kids three summers in a row.

Okay, maybe this scenario was much funnier in my head. I need to get better at this blogging.

This is the Jump.

Tri-Park Video 2005

So, I haven't posted about the Tri-Park yet, but I will give an in-depth thing when the video's done. I want to make note now, though, of something I discovered while going through the tapes.

On the first course, McCarty has an abysmal front nine, and Jeff makes some crack about coming back from 12 down the next day. Here's the thing: he did.

This is the Jump.

A Thing and a Feature

First of all, I vanquished the fax machine and its toner while wearing a white shirt, and it doesn't look like I just emerged from a coal mine. Good for me. Secondly, I need to find a place to display "I'm Currently Reading:" and "I'm Currently Listening To:" and maybe "I'm Currently Watching," and maybe "I'm Currently Playing."

So for now:

I'm Currently Reading: Mr. Midshipman Hornblower

I'm Currently Listening To: The Daily Source Code Podcast. It's something to do.

I'm Currently Watching: Well, TiVo got both Black Adder and Six Feet Under, so I was involved with those briefly.

I'm Currently Playing: Nothing. My PS2 is still broken, much to my NCAA 2006-less chagrin.

This is the Jump.

Survey Says:

I got called to take a survey today. This happens on occasion - I signed up with some research marketing group ages ago, and they call me every now and then. ANYWAY, it's on shaving. Specifically, they give me some razor, I shave with it for a week, and I tell them what I think. They give me another razor, I shave with it for a week, etc. I do this one more time, they give me $40. Which is probably what I'm spending in gas to get out there, but whatever. It also means I get a meal in the OP on Monday nights. I'm kind of hoping that I get a regular Gillette Whatever, some new fancy razor, and a scythe. I think that would be awesome.

This is the Jump.