An Open Letter to Douchebags

First in a series

Dear Prius Guy With California Plates:

I see you're brushing your windshield with a broom. Oh! Your side windows, too! Just so you're aware, you look like a dink.

Oh, this part should be great. I'll wait.

...

Yes! That pebbling on your windshield is ice! No, the broom from your kitchen will not remove that. Your fingernail will take a long-ass time and give you frostbite. Well done.

Winter in Chicago will last until March, so I'd get to work on aquiring a scraper.

Welcome to the Big Ten,
C-Dog